seems like taking forever to write diary entries is becoming such a trend on my site. everytime i sit down to write one, brain goes nuts and doesn't wanna sit still to write. WRITE!!!! COME ON!!!!

well let's see here what's been going on? well it's almost july. wow, almost july, finally here... july... that means summer! wow i hate summer but all the best fruits are summer fruits... as for fireworks, you can probably guess it's probably gonna be a little wild since we always go nuts. in fact i think last year was such a show that the people at the town hall wants to talk to our friend who set off the fireworks to make a more official show?? i forgor the details but it got lots of attention that's for sure but i won't be with my fiance physically this time around, sadly. things haven't aligned themselves for it to be possible for us to be with one another for our anniversary! actually, with july coming around, it's been a year since the subway bosses were added to pokemon masters right? oh my god, it's been that long? a year? not gonna lie, feels like a whole century. that's how long i've gone back to submas hell. it's been an experience watching the submas fandom revive itself and how different it is from the way it was, but a lot of things are still the same. isn't that strange? it's a monkey's paw for me, i get all the content i want but then somehow things got weirder than they used to be, at the cost of the fact that i get content that caters to my taste more than anything else from 2010-2014 did. i can live with this... besides i make my own premium private content now and my art is good enough for me to actually enjoy it AHAHAHAHAHA

OH, SPEAKING OF ART. ARTFIGHT 2022'S THEME CAME OUT A FEW DAYS AGOOOOOO LETS GOOOOOO it's bloom vs decay! wow! or as i call it cottagecore vs goblincore. it's treeeendy. i'm going to be on team bloom because i'm a cottagecore soul, and my fiance is going to be on team decay since he wants to pick the opposite i do. super fun right? i was steampunk last year and sugar the year before that. i still have regrets that i missed out on team dream... sigh... i have some references of characters that i need to update but i've been on it. last year i pumped out a lot of art and references but to be honest i was drawing so much and working myself into a tizzy then experiencing burnout so much so that the references just aren't very good. i'm going to take some extra care for the OCs that changed in the year that i revived them. you can blame submas brainrot for some of the ones i have on there (one of them is literally "we have submas at home"). if you wanna take a look at my art fight, here it is! it's also just like, on my links page...

back to actual IRL stuff, i'm getting an eye exam and a root canal soon. yes, one of my front teeth kicked the bucket on me, BUT this time i don't need to get a crown! woo... ahaha... i think... seriously it's been agony. it doesn't hurt like it used to but yeah i knew it was a dead tooth. i got a crown on a different one and it was much the same problem i was having before. same pain and everything... it's a throbbing pain that made it difficult to even eat, you see. 0/10 don't recommend as for the eye exam IDK my eyesight just kinda blows, i'm super nearsighted and the last time i went to see an eye doctor for it he told me "you don't have a job that requires glasses right?" and when i said "no " he said "then you don't need glasses!" and legend has it that my mom is still pissed about it to this day i hope i can find some good glasses, i don't know which ones will look good on me. i think big round ones are the certified "kawaii" style but if it makes my face any rounder than it already is i'm going to turn into the moon. maybe i'll just wear contacts idk. my brother has glasses and when he isn't wearing them he looks like a peeled orange it's bizarre to see. my mom used to wear glasses a long time ago but she got lasik when i was a kid and hasn't worn them on the regular since. ah, and speaking of medical shit, i won't be getting my ~mysterious mental illnesses~ diagnosed for quite a while... but i'm gonna be honest i'm like 98% sure i'm autistic. i was really looking into it for about a week earlier this month and i talked to my dad (autism is hereditary and he and i are A LOT alike) and all the pieces started to click together after that. i'm not going to officially make any "i'm DEFINITELY autistic" claims because i want an official diagnosis, but i also heard from a lot of people online that getting diagnosed as an adult is hell if you live in the wrong area of the therapist you're seeing just doesn't diagnose adults? THAT'S A THING? can't believe that shit what a clown world we live in where something like that happens. absolute circus of a reality this is. it's not like your autism just goes away after a while. i heard some people approve of self-diagnosing mental illnesses if healthcare isn't an option, for example, those of us in the yoo ess of ayy (lmao) but i still don't feel comfy with just saying i have it. feels disrespectful... i'm just gonna say that i'm "VERY LIKELY" autistic and leave it at that i think.

well, with this diary entry coming to an end and me possibly being delirious from lack of sleep idk my schedule is capital F "FUCKT" right now, so too does pride month. AHHH YEAH YOU THOUGHT I WASN'T GONNA MENTION IT HUH well i kinda wasn't, it's not relevant to me because i'm not in the LGBT community, but i really do love this video and also saying "happy birthday to gays everywhere" when i used social media more. was it good this year??? i don't know i live under a rock that has hello kitty painted on it. i only know that i'm writing this diary entry before hockey season is over and that i'm gonna be slightly sad if the colorado avalanche don't win the stanley cup my investment is almost non-existent but i still want to see it happen. ok i have nothing left to add i need to lay down BYE

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holy shit its been TWO months since my last update on this site. i've got no ideas! none! head empty! life uneventful! brain machine simply broke

well, i guess that isn't totally true. i went to a hockey game a while ago. it was pretty okay. we ended up losing it was kind of a bummer, but it was still fun. otherwise i have been doing absolutely nothing, at least as far as leaving my house goes. at least in terms of my recent ventures into art, i have been embracing drawing what me, myself, and i would like to draw. know what i mean? used to cringe super hard at what i did or even the idea of it but i've settled back into drawing the stuff that i don't necessarily share with other people. no, no, don't worry, it's nothing especially raunchy or something that would put me on an FBI list (unless my government assigned agent hates my guts when i draw reuniclus shitposting. if thats the case then no i will not stop, eat my socks fbi man ). it's just that totally self-indulgent guilty pleasure stuff you think you're too ~old~ for and that you've ~outgrown~ that kind of thing. i'm still a little cowardly about talking about it because i'm afraid it would be offputting even if it isn't that deep. i've been getting a teensy weensy bit braver about it though. especially with the recent embracing of people being more open about their special interests or hyperfixations or whatever the words people like to use. there's like 10 different terms. given my neurodivergency that still has yet to be identified properly, i think it's time i just embrace it, too. drawing this kind of thing is cathartic, honestly, and it's pleasing to look at the monitor and grin at the serotonin it produces. i don't really expect others to understand anymore but damn it would be cool if they did. maybe i ought to get one of those friend groups sometime ahahahaha sike

ah in other news, i have infections in both of my ears which is WHACK ive never had an ear infection before im pretty sure. so like, going on antibiotics for it. lots of fluid behind my eardrums. my mom, total genius she is, wanted me to take my brother's antibiotics because she's a doctor (DISCLAIMER: SHE IS NOT IN FACT ANY KIND OF DOCTOR WHATSOEVER) but his stuff has penicillin in it, which i should Not be having. i don't think she considered that. it's a good thing we don't listen to her all the time, besides the fact that you have to take ALL of the antibiotics for it to actually work. it's not like a basic daily vitamin thing, its a perscription for a reason. smh. anyways i'm not really in pain anymore and the worst of my sinus infection (which i got from my brother who i think got it from my great nephew) that came with or caused the ear infection is over. humidifiers really make a difference, it's true. now i only have a teeny bit of ickiness and don't need to blow my nose a lot, but my throat gets pretty dry sometimes. it was reaaaaal baaaad a week ago. now my ears just keep popping like i'm going into the mountains lol. if you know, you know. same as with an airplane. i think i'd be dead if i had to be on an airplane during this, i tried it once with a regular sinus infection, literally never again holy shit. and on top of that the ear infection has been irritating my vertigo which is at it's peak in horridness, so that's really really fun! really fun! please end my misery!

OH!!!! oh god, oh god, oh my god i can't just not talk about what happened this month in pokemon masters. i've been unable to write a diary entry here but i've been losing it on tumblr (i've also been drawing a lot you should go to my links page and look ahaha )... but... finally, the subway bosses! they got their pokemon masters alts and they're just HILARIOUS AND SUPER CUTE. they're butlers! cute little butlers. the tumblr sexymanification of ingo and emmet. i managed to yoink them both with my free gems and didn't drop a dime on them which is great!!! the boys came home for me, isn't that sweet? after i struggled to get giratina cynthia (hey. listen. i see goth girls, i pull. thems is the breaks. ) i was worried i wouldn't have the gems but thankfully i could ignore everything around me during valentines day and march being boring as it was (kinda wanted serena but that's that i guess... glad i didn't go for her). when i saw those butler subway bosses i was in the middle of a walmart and a fellow submas yumejoshi pinged me on discord about it. i almost passed out in the checkout line. i'm so glad that they got alts, i don't even care if they never get anything ever again. i'm also waiting on warden ingo... know what i mean? that's gonna be awkward. also ingo is fucking bald thank you based PLA concept art book, i was shocked at first but now i love it i'll rub his head for good luck and give him a bunch of kisses, i'm not a coward

ummmm other than that what else have i been doing..................... well, nothin'... been sort of cleaning my room a little but i have a lot of stuff i dont really know where to put. its a bit tragic, it kind of just sits around in boxes on the floor. speaking of boxes! recently, i asked my bf if i could get something, and it was the wet n wild little twin stars makeup set. the box for it was HUGE and i was surprised. but the actual product fits in the makeup bag it came with?! wet n wild is a brand i'm familiar with because mom has been using wet n wild mascara since i was an itty bitty babby, so i knew what i was getting into. and its pretty alright! not bad at all. i love having cute packaging for makeup, and the biggest plus is that the box it all came in is SUPER DUPER cute. absolutely ecstatic about that one, it even fits under my bed! but i already have some under-the-bed storage and it's a bit of a shame to hide such a cute box... what do i put in it? i just don't know. could put my 10 million cups in there because i love collecting cute drinkware. it's a sickness, really...

anyways i think that it, time to disappear for three months AHAHAHAHAH

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oh it's a cool number day! i think this calls for a cool ol' diary entry! first of the year, too, actually, isn't it? i been a bit lazy lol

so like the biggest thing that's been absolutely consuming my life right now is subway bosses. it was like this for a while yes but it is in FULL FORCE NOW because we got content. now, i generally don't want to spoil anything for people playing the game or what have you, so i'm going to put it under a spoiler holy shit please work i am begging you do not make me edit this diary twice

anyways other than that i've been doing... uh yeah. i've been doing. i might move out soon to live down south with my bf in TEGSUS or something and i am kind of scared because texas is humid as fuck. see i do cold, not humid. god no, i love my snow and chilly weather and i cannot stand too much heat. it is AGONY. but i want to be living in my own place, because being here is suffocating. not to get shitty or anything so i won't...

i can't think of much else to put here ummm ummmmmmmmmm my boyfriend was here for a while so that was nice. we didn't get to actually spend valentine's day together but we still went on some dates and all that. oh man, has my life really been so uneventful other than "i'm moving and getting married soon thereafter"? well, when it comes to weddings, i don't want one... i wanna sign the papers and fuck off, yknow? not even acknowledge it. just make it legal and don't tell anyone. people make a huge deal out of marriage and all that and it IS special but in my case i think having a wedding would be a hassle because i'm not interested in having parties or nothin'. socializing is very hard and i'm incredibly fucking bad at it and i hate talking to people in real life so i would rather just not. i think i got worse because of pandemic or something because i notice i've been increasingly bad at interacting with humans. maybe it's that thing i was going to get diagnosed... the autism. still haven't done it. i also need glasses! i can't see shit from far away! maybe if i squint but not even then! and i have a cavity to take care of. lol.

uh jeez i guess that must cover it all huh, that i can think of anyways. it's like so much has happened in the last few months that there's nothing worth talking about, and then it's like literally nothing has happened... i guess pokemon day is soon i hope we hear about PLA getting some DLC. take me back home! take me back to the future! i want to see emmet and give him a kiss! A KISS!!!!! I WANT TO KISS EMMET GAMEFREAK PLEASE I BEG YOU

oh and as for the website and what i plan to do with my time on the internet, i guess i should update some pages and actually work on a few of them huh??? that would be something wouldn't it yeah sure would. if you're curious about what i've been doing besides posting anonymously on imageboards about my subway boss thirst (DOWN HORRENDOUS) i've been trying to post on newgrounds and tumblr again, which you can find links to on my links page. though i reject social media and refuse to let twitter grasp me in it's slimy fucking talons again, tumblr is okay for now. i just won't follow anybody i think. i got real tired of following people and then getting a bunch of shit on my dash that i did not want to see, so i have opted to never follow anyone. ever... maybe my boyfriend though but other than that? nah... i face the wall and draw stuff for others to enjoy but i will never turn to face the people. i am mentally better off this way.

anyways when you hear from me again i guess i'll be screaming about DLC or more unova games or subway boss alts OKAY CYA

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